superniceone | tfln overflow / open post

"I can tell. You're the only person I've ever met who makes it appealing instead of annoying." Is Verso his boyfriend? Does he have a boyfriend? That feels like an insane word to use given the circumstances (literally unprecedented circumstances, with not a goddamn normal moment between them), and even without them— too juvenile for a man of thirty-two to use.

So he won't use the word, but he is going to wonder.

"How's Lune doing, by the way? She seems... caught up in thought. I haven't wanted to interrupt."

He has a Problem, which is kind of like having a boyfriend.

It feels strange to have Gustave ask him how Lune is doing, considering that Gustave has known Lune her whole life. There's a shared camaraderie, though, between people with insane parents, so he does feel he understands what Lune is experiencing better than most.

"I'm sure she'd appreciate your company." She's brooding, yes—he knows what that looks like—but comfort from a friend can rarely go wrong. "Parents are... complicated." Hers more than most. They loved her, he's sure, but they also loved what she could do for them, what she represented. Maybe they loved that more than who she really was. It's a familiar feeling. "Lots of impossible expectations."

It would be- well, a severe overstatement to say that Gustave and Lune have been fighting, or even that there's any real tension between them at all. She has implied frustration or disappointment a few times, subtle and incisive and in a way that makes him wish she'd just employ her usual matter-of-fact bluntness. He knows ultimately she's worried he's letting himself get distracted from the mission, wishes he'd save this weird sort-of-sneaking-around until business was all settled, but their clashing approaches to the Expedition had been a throughline for them since she'd found him after the beach. Why change it now, he thinks wryly.

Still. He'd approach when she seemed a little more receptive to it. He recognises her current look, focused on unpeeling some idea layer by layer; Gustave is sure he'd be waved off if he tried to initiate anything now.

"Mm." He's pausing, weighing his own words. "I can't relate, actually. My parents were great. Not to rub it in." He still missed them fiercely.

"Brag, why don't you?"

Must be nice to have a family that isn't completely unhinged. He's not offended, though; it's a nice change in conversation. Something pleasant. Their loss probably feels like a crater in Gustave's heart, if it's anything like Verso's experience losing family, but at least these ones have the potential to come back.

Weird. They'd be like Maelle's grandparents. Again, that's a strange family dynamic he's not sure how to navigate.

"I'm sure they'll be impressed with everything you've accomplished."

Gustave casts a sidelong glance at Verso, hesitating before he shakes his head no. "I think the city of Lumière will fare a lot better if we focus on the future instead of the past."

And he doesn't know what Maelle's limitations will be, knows that the city is going to need to be able to stand on its own without her. Simply bringing back a century of dead would crush the city beneath the weight of its own people.

Have a sidelong glance back!! He quirks one eyebrow, questioning. "Are you going to tell her that before or after she brings back everyone you knew?"

He's not judging, really. It's just curiosity. Someone has to decide which people deserve to live and which fade into oblivion.

Gustave hesitates, glancing at him again. His voice drops, cautious. "Are you sure that's going to be something she can even do? The chroma — how long will it hold onto memories? I worry we're putting the cart before the horse."

"I, uh, don't know." He's not exactly an expert on repainting things that have been erased for decades, especially not people. No one's ever bothered to do that before. "They might... be different." But, clearly, 'different' hasn't been a historical deterrent for bringing back the dead.

Gustave cringes at that, considering his own hands for a moment. "Yeah. Might be better to just keep the let the— past lie."

"Well, you turned out all right." Lightening the mood, as best he can. "I'm sure Maelle will... use her judgment."

"Is it weird that I worry that I didn't?" He glances at him again. "I feel like I didn't used to worry this much."

Gustave has always worried like an old mémère, but that doesn't seem helpful to share right now. Verso is still smarting from being overly glib with Gustave before, so he veers on the side of caution instead.

"It's challenging to find out the world is..." How to put this in a way that won't send Gustave into an existential spiral? "Different than you thought." At least Gustave had sweet Maelle to explain it to him. Verso had to hear it from Clea. "You're still adjusting."

And he will adjust. Probably. Verso's not a good role model for that, though. "Does it bother you?"

"Yes." Gustave doesn't need to think about it; he's spent a lot of time thinking about it already. They're disposable, their fates fully reliant upon the whimsy of gods who are either unhealthily invested or actively attempting their destruction. The world around them is a lie, yawning and blank.

But Verso knows all this, and complaining about it to him seems melodramatic at best and cruel at worst. At least he was just an accidental creation, incidental.

He takes an uncertain breath and realizes he's been quiet for too long.

"But I'll get over it."

Well, he had a nice run of feeling good about himself for a few days, but he feels guilty all over again hearing Gustave express unhappiness with the way of things. Why wouldn't he be unhappy? He and everyone else in Lumiére were created to be background characters so that Aline's life with Verso felt more realistic.

"It helps," he says a little uselessly, grasping at straws to try to make Gustave feel better, "to throw yourself into something."

Like he'd done with expelling Aline from the Canvas. It had given him some sense of purpose, a feeling that the misery would come to an end at some point.

He nudges Gustave with a knee. "...Or to write anguished poetry."

Gustave nudges his knee back, shaking his head apologetically. "I'll be fine. Really. It's hard to feel too artificial after waking up stiff after another night on the ground."

He smiles wryly at him. "I've really killed the mood, huh. I'm sorry, minou." The pet names are only ever in private and completely nonserious.

Oh, my god!!! Verso rubs his face. "I was going to say that I'm into tortured guys, but clearly, you need to be knocked down a peg."

"What, is minou no good? I've got others. I've been sitting on mon soleil chéri for a while now." Gustave laughs a little helplessly. "Or maybe I shouldn't torture you minutes after you agreed to be exclusive."

"To which you only said okay, that's settled." And then immediately called him a brat. Very unromantic!!

—okay, so maybe Verso has a point. A tiny, minor one. But Gustave is making active efforts to be less cheesy!!

He clears his throat. "I'm ready for you to sleep in touching distance. Even readier to wake up next to you after a long night. It's my favorite daydream right now."

For a fleeting moment, he wonders if Gustave is right, and that he did come back changed, and that somehow Maelle accidentally made him like Verso more. He'll never know. Tough pill to swallow.

"...Careful. I get handsy in my sleep. Just ask Monoco."

Verso seemed extremely underwhelmed by his practical and utilitarian answer of okay, that's good, so Gustave is laying the blame for his awkward oversharing fully on Verso's shoulders.

His face scrunches in amusement. "You've got plenty of time to think up a better excuse if you're trying to deter me," he says, gentle and lighthearted.

"I'm not trying to deter you." Although he's self-aware enough to recognize that he probably should be. Gustave just expressed how much this world's fabricated nature bothers him, and that's really all Verso's fault, when you get down to it. "Just making sure you're all right with the little spoon."

Gustave considers Verso a victim of this situation, someone who had asked to be a part of it as much as any of them did; it would be hypocritical to blame him and not Maelle, and blaming Maelle honestly just feels like a sin.

So he holds up on hand, sort of wobbling it back and forth. "We can't take turns?"

Gustave is also delusional enough to still like Verso, so his opinion doesn't really have weight!! But Verso is trying this whole 'be a better person to deserve good things' strategy, so maybe he can swing this, as long as no one ever finds out anything he's ever done in his life prior. Or the fact that he's still lying about them now.

"Wow," he says, although there's a hint of amusement in his voice, a crinkle in his eye. "Are you trying to bargain with me right now?"

Gustave snorts, reaching up to fix a piece of Verso's hair for no reason other than he knows he hates having it out of place. And in his defense, he's tried to reason himself out of liking Verso; it's just not worked very well.

"Sure, let's call it that." It's actually kind of strange to joke about holding each other; he's still weirdly certain they'll never make it to that stage of their relationship. It feels too — real, for lack of a better term.

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