It's true that Gustave hasn't had an abundance of reasons to be loudly joyful in a long time—but it's equally true that he's found himself taking more comfort in Verso than anyone else. He thinks sometimes about what it is that binds them now that the Expedition is over (knowledge, mostly, of the Canvas's situation, of the dire circumstances of Maelle's continued existence here), and wonders with a pang if Verso's interest will hold when that problem is resolved.
Ridiculous to think about now, maybe, with Verso in his arms, with the growing confidence of his own meticulously counted steps.
Gustave ducks his head to hide his own smile at those words. The music tapers off; he doesn't stop dancing just yet. "And I'm all yours, mon couer."
write it cœur with the ligature like a real frenchie or get out of here
The music stops, and he feels reluctant to let the evening come to an end. Reluctant to let any of this come to an end, really. A strange feeling; normally he spends his life wishing it was over.
"Then come with me," Verso blurts out and quickly regrets. He fumbles a step, goes forward when he should have gone back and steps on Gustave's toes. "...Back to my place. I'll, uh—" With a cheeky sort of delivery meant to help recover after his blunder: "Kick my roommate out again."
It doesn't hurt, but it does startle him. The impulse, admittedly, is to tease—Gustave was meant to be the clumsy one, right?—but the look of regret on in Verso's eyes makes it feel like maybe he shouldn't.
"Okay," he says instead, voice gentle, and loops his arm around Verso's waist to squeeze him closer for a moment. "I did sleep extremely well last night."
Verso's heart beats a little too fast from the plea that he didn't mean to make. It's a relief in many ways that Gustave doesn't pick up on—or at least outwardly acknowledge—any underlying meaning to come with me, and yet—
Selfishly, he wants to know what Gustave would say. 'You're so convinced that things are going to fall apart,' he had said, 'that you're pulling the linchpin and making the wheels fall off early just so you can say you did it on your own terms'. Maybe that's what this is, this fear of asking. Or maybe, Verso thinks to himself, it's just realism. Someone who's dedicated his life to Lumière would never be happy elsewhere for long. Asking for more than Gustave can give would spoil the time they have left.
"I think you would have slept like that with or without me," he says, because Gustave was so fatigued that he hadn't cared that Verso was literally on top of him and kissing his face with licentious intent. (He's still vaguely put out about that.) "But I'll take the compliment."
Idly, he smooths down a wrinkle in Gustave's collar. "Sorry about your foot. Just not used to following."
It is that exact devotion causing Gustave the stress and frustration that he's been carrying around with him since the truth of the Canvas had been revealed. It was one thing to dedicate his life to Lumière, maybe the last fragment of humanity left after the Fracture had scattered everyone far and wide. To preserving its history for future generations, because there was knowledge too valuable in those stories to risk losing.
It was something else entirely to devote himself to Lumière, the ant farm the same age as the man in front of him. Gustave still loves his city, and always will — but it's harder to center his entire identity around it anymore, knowing their existence was never meant to be anything more than set dressing. Even more: knowing how fragile the existence of their world was at all. There's no longer a timer on the Monolith, but when things are quiet he's certain he can still hear the ticking of a clock.
"Well, we'll test it again tonight, then. And if I sleep like a baby again, you're going to have to just deal with being my safety blanket for a while." He lightly taps the top of Verso's foot with his own, before finally releasing him. "And it's harder than you think, isn't it?" Doing it all backwards!!!
The dance ends, and Verso is a bit rueful. He'd been dreading going to the party, but up here, alone with Gustave, he'd had fun. Felt light, even, like he wasn't dragging around a century's worth of emotional baggage. Although he steps back, he lets his fingertips linger lightly against Gustave's wrist.
"Yeah, yeah." He rolls his eyes, but— "Hey." He smiles, crooked. "Nice to meet you for the first time."
Gustave hesitates for just a second, eyes searching Verso's face to make sure he's not being secretly maudlin, before he leans into it. Intentionally over the top and a bit silly, he grips Verso's hand, leaning in to kiss the back of it.
"Wonderful meeting you for the definite first time ever. It's an honor."
Maelle would be horrified at how dorky he's being; he tries not to think about how selfishly he misses the way she once relied on him.
It's incredibly dorky. (Un?)fortunately, though, Verso has found that he's into dorky. A lot. That crooked smile spreads out, and he turns his hand over to take Gustave's chin between his fingers and kiss him. Quickly, and without heat or intention to make it anything but chaste. Affection for the sake of affection, because he likes to feel the heat of Gustave's face against his. Because people aren't meant to go decades without being touched in a loving way by another human being.
"Sorry," he says as he pulls away, again a little pink, the way he'd been after kissing Gustave this morning. It just all feels a bit— transparently self-indulgent. Like something he shouldn't be caught doing. "You must think I'm very forward, given that we just met."
Gustave is fascinated by how gestures of affection that come— well— naturally, easily to him are the ones that seem to trip Verso up the most. Affection for the sake of affection, because life was (for everyone but Verso) too short not to indulge in it. He steps in, crowding him just enough to brush a soft kiss against the slight pinkening of his cheek.
"Not at all," he says, trying to ease any embarrassment he can. "I'd rather you own it than apologise for it."
"How tolerant of you," is wry, but pleased. There's no part of him that thought Gustave, who'd tried to cuddle after exchanging perfunctory handjobs in the woods, would judge him for a kiss. It's only himself he's worried about doing that; things like impulsive kisses and dances on rooftops are things he's long disregarded as meant for everyone but him, and it's still challenging to accept that this is something he's allowed to have, too.
For a few more weeks, anyway.
"I have to admit, I did hear through the grapevine that you're an excessive kisser."
Gustave laughs again, because of all the possible things that could have followed him—
"It's true. You're looking at a guilty man." He's mock-exasperated as he gently pushes Verso away, turning instead to look at what he can see of the harbor from the edge of the roof. "I hope you won't hold it against me."
"There are a lot more interesting things I'd rather hold against you," he says, incorrigible.
"But before that"—because he's assuming that he will be holding his body against Gustave's tonight, at least because he's had a couple glasses of wine and he's feeling rather inclined to try this newfangled thing called cuddling—"I think I'm in the mood to compose, if my muse is in the mood to inspire."
You know, sit around, look handsome, listen to him improv.
Gustave seems to need a moment to decide if being referred to as a muse is making fun of him or not; he tilts his head at Verso, fuzzy caterpillar eyebrows knit in curiosity, before he hums a sound of pleasant agreement.
"I have always wanted to listen to you play," he says, half-smiling. "Behind the scenes with musical genius—I'm a lucky man." Gustave rounds back to face him again, stepping in a little close in a way meant to read as playful. "You want to head back now?"
Musical genius is perhaps a little overexaggerated, but he'll take it. Verso laughs, fingers curling around Gustave's wrist again. They're so scrawny; he can hardly believe Gustave was ever swinging around a sword. Then again, Verso's closer to a rakish man of leisure than a burly brawler himself, so maybe he doesn't have any room to judge.
"If you've had enough of dancing," he says, because he doesn't want to deny Gustave if he's having a good time, but— teasingly: "I can only assume you found it to be a torture worse than death."
You know, considering how hard he'd tried to avoid even practicing in Verso's living room.
He had! Just felt awkward! Which is probably a ridiculous way to have felt, considering he'd been intimate with Verso in ways he'd never dreamed of being with anyone else; it was a little dramatic, maybe, to think he might be turned off by clumsy dancing after everything else.
"Come on, one more song, then," he says, gently pulling at the hand wrapped round his wrist. "Just because we came all the way up here."
"Just because," Verso agrees, hand clasping Gustave's and other arm winding around his waist, just a little on the side of 'inappropriately close for dancing in public'. They're dancing in private, so it's fine. No one around to judge if their pelvises are touching in a non-family-friendly way.
"I should thank you, by the way." For a lot of things, probably, but primarily, "For stopping me from spoiling the night."
Even if a part of him does still feel like Gustave would be better off if he'd spent the night striking things up with Sophie again.
"I've tried to keep people at arm's length, in the past. Knowing that it'll... hurt, to lose them." Gustave, on the other hand, seems to have gone all in on making limited time count. Maybe he should be the same. "But I'm prepared to dedicate every second you'll give me to obnoxiously charming you, if you'll let me."
It strikes him again how starkly different this feels compared to dancing with Sophie. Verso's hand is rougher, his body lean without feeling soft or fragile. He can feel a more obvious strength in the pressure of the arm around his waist. It's not that he prefers it, exactly, but it's definitely novel — and the fact that he's pretty besotted with Verso in general helps a lot, too.
"Why would you—" He cuts himself off and laughs as he finds his steps. "You're welcome to charm me as much as you like. But— I'm just as happy for you to just— be, too." Lazing around, reading together — eating a breakfast of terrible eggs, even — were the sorts of mundane things that spelled contentment for him.
He wonders, too, if Verso will still feel that way if Gustave finds him, two or six or sixty months from now, when he's finally convinced Maelle to leave, when he finally feels good about the future of the Canvas again. But that's heavy, and tonight feels adequately salvaged, so he doesn't.
Eyes to the sky, Verso represses the urge to groan. Gustave is the most difficult person to romance in the world, bar none.
"I'm trying to say that I'm— all in." On this. On Gustave, specifically. That he's not going to have one foot constantly out the door anymore. A little exasperated, but still fond: "But clearly, it's my fate to have all of my grand romantic gestures brushed off by you."
"Anyway—" He steps to the side, rotates his body, and tugs Gustave into what is undoubtedly a clumsy dip. "I thought you liked when I tried too hard."
Gustave does more of an "awkward bend backwards" than a real dip, but the trust is there — he will lean into it enough that he would definitely fall onto his ass if Verso just let him go.
He doesn't say what feels obvious to him, that the grand gesture of saying he's all in maybe only falls a little flat because they've got barely more than two full weeks together now. Between the rooftop date and the penetrative sex, Gustave had assumed Verso was pretty committed to him for the time they had left together already.
"I do," he admits after he straightens up. He finds himself idly wishing he'd actually paid attention to learning to dance when he was younger. "And I'm trying to say, you're especially sexy when you're relaxed. That's all."
You can penetrate a person you're not committed to. Verso thinks about dumping Gustave, like, every five seconds. Even a little bit tonight!
...Which he's not going to do anymore, obviously. He's a new man, a better man. He's going to give Gustave a nice few weeks to fondly look back on once he's married Sophie and had 2.5 children with her, or whatever his future might hold.
"Fine," he says as Gustave returns to verticality, "I won't charm you. I'll pick my nose and leave the toilet seat up."
"Oh, good. I can start leaving my dirty underwear all over the place, then," Gustave says, like he hadn't had the impulse to fold his goddamn clothes the first time he'd gotten undressed in the woods with Verso. He pulls him in to kiss him soundly, hands firm as they grip his hips, and there's genuine warmth on his face as he pulls back and nods towards the stairs.
"You taste like wine," he says, and it's a compliment.
"You don't," Verso points out, considering that Gustave barely drank at all. Things had gotten swiftly awkward after he'd been given his glass, after all. Not that it had stopped Verso from downing his.
He steps back, too, hand skimming the railing as he takes the stairs down. "We'll have to rectify that. Music is better listened to with a drink." Especially when it's vaguely embarrassing 'you're my muse' improvisation.
Gustave had been a little worried about the awkward getting even worse if he'd let himself start drinking, too. He's sure they'll butt heads again probably sooner rather than later, but it feels safe enough now to unwind with a glass or two.
"We can share a bottle," he agrees, brushing his hand idly against the back of Verso's shirt as he follows him down the stairs. "I'm all in, too, by the way. In case that wasn't... implied obviously enough."
Smart. If they'd gotten in a wine-drunk domestic dispute in the middle of a party, Verso would probably never show his face outside again.
He did embarrass himself in front of Sophie and Lucien, admittedly, but two people are easier to avoid than the entire population of Lumière. Besides, it's not like he was going to be chatting it up with Gustave's ex-girlfriend, anyway. What would he say? Wow, we have such similar taste in men.
Once he reaches the bottom of the steps, he turns to lounge against the railing, saying, "And here I thought you were just using me for my body."
Gustave does the sort of long drag of his eyes down Verso's body that actually embarrasses him slightly, even if it is fully meant to be playful. "Only mostly for your body," he says, gently nudging his shoulder. "Do I have time to pick up a change of clothes from home, or is this inspiration fleeting?"
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Ridiculous to think about now, maybe, with Verso in his arms, with the growing confidence of his own meticulously counted steps.
Gustave ducks his head to hide his own smile at those words. The music tapers off; he doesn't stop dancing just yet. "And I'm all yours, mon couer."
write it cœur with the ligature like a real frenchie or get out of here
"Then come with me," Verso blurts out and quickly regrets. He fumbles a step, goes forward when he should have gone back and steps on Gustave's toes. "...Back to my place. I'll, uh—" With a cheeky sort of delivery meant to help recover after his blunder: "Kick my roommate out again."
you literally cannot make me
"Okay," he says instead, voice gentle, and loops his arm around Verso's waist to squeeze him closer for a moment. "I did sleep extremely well last night."
only bc i lack the power to freeze the thread 😔
Selfishly, he wants to know what Gustave would say. 'You're so convinced that things are going to fall apart,' he had said, 'that you're pulling the linchpin and making the wheels fall off early just so you can say you did it on your own terms'. Maybe that's what this is, this fear of asking. Or maybe, Verso thinks to himself, it's just realism. Someone who's dedicated his life to Lumière would never be happy elsewhere for long. Asking for more than Gustave can give would spoil the time they have left.
"I think you would have slept like that with or without me," he says, because Gustave was so fatigued that he hadn't cared that Verso was literally on top of him and kissing his face with licentious intent. (He's still vaguely put out about that.) "But I'll take the compliment."
Idly, he smooths down a wrinkle in Gustave's collar. "Sorry about your foot. Just not used to following."
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It was something else entirely to devote himself to Lumière, the ant farm the same age as the man in front of him. Gustave still loves his city, and always will — but it's harder to center his entire identity around it anymore, knowing their existence was never meant to be anything more than set dressing. Even more: knowing how fragile the existence of their world was at all. There's no longer a timer on the Monolith, but when things are quiet he's certain he can still hear the ticking of a clock.
"Well, we'll test it again tonight, then. And if I sleep like a baby again, you're going to have to just deal with being my safety blanket for a while." He lightly taps the top of Verso's foot with his own, before finally releasing him. "And it's harder than you think, isn't it?" Doing it all backwards!!!
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"Yeah, yeah." He rolls his eyes, but— "Hey." He smiles, crooked. "Nice to meet you for the first time."
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"Wonderful meeting you for the definite first time ever. It's an honor."
Maelle would be horrified at how dorky he's being; he tries not to think about how selfishly he misses the way she once relied on him.
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"Sorry," he says as he pulls away, again a little pink, the way he'd been after kissing Gustave this morning. It just all feels a bit— transparently self-indulgent. Like something he shouldn't be caught doing. "You must think I'm very forward, given that we just met."
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"Not at all," he says, trying to ease any embarrassment he can. "I'd rather you own it than apologise for it."
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For a few more weeks, anyway.
"I have to admit, I did hear through the grapevine that you're an excessive kisser."
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"It's true. You're looking at a guilty man." He's mock-exasperated as he gently pushes Verso away, turning instead to look at what he can see of the harbor from the edge of the roof. "I hope you won't hold it against me."
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"But before that"—because he's assuming that he will be holding his body against Gustave's tonight, at least because he's had a couple glasses of wine and he's feeling rather inclined to try this newfangled thing called cuddling—"I think I'm in the mood to compose, if my muse is in the mood to inspire."
You know, sit around, look handsome, listen to him improv.
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"I have always wanted to listen to you play," he says, half-smiling. "Behind the scenes with musical genius—I'm a lucky man." Gustave rounds back to face him again, stepping in a little close in a way meant to read as playful. "You want to head back now?"
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"If you've had enough of dancing," he says, because he doesn't want to deny Gustave if he's having a good time, but— teasingly: "I can only assume you found it to be a torture worse than death."
You know, considering how hard he'd tried to avoid even practicing in Verso's living room.
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"Come on, one more song, then," he says, gently pulling at the hand wrapped round his wrist. "Just because we came all the way up here."
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"I should thank you, by the way." For a lot of things, probably, but primarily, "For stopping me from spoiling the night."
Even if a part of him does still feel like Gustave would be better off if he'd spent the night striking things up with Sophie again.
"I've tried to keep people at arm's length, in the past. Knowing that it'll... hurt, to lose them." Gustave, on the other hand, seems to have gone all in on making limited time count. Maybe he should be the same. "But I'm prepared to dedicate every second you'll give me to obnoxiously charming you, if you'll let me."
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"Why would you—" He cuts himself off and laughs as he finds his steps. "You're welcome to charm me as much as you like. But— I'm just as happy for you to just— be, too." Lazing around, reading together — eating a breakfast of terrible eggs, even — were the sorts of mundane things that spelled contentment for him.
He wonders, too, if Verso will still feel that way if Gustave finds him, two or six or sixty months from now, when he's finally convinced Maelle to leave, when he finally feels good about the future of the Canvas again. But that's heavy, and tonight feels adequately salvaged, so he doesn't.
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"I'm trying to say that I'm— all in." On this. On Gustave, specifically. That he's not going to have one foot constantly out the door anymore. A little exasperated, but still fond: "But clearly, it's my fate to have all of my grand romantic gestures brushed off by you."
"Anyway—" He steps to the side, rotates his body, and tugs Gustave into what is undoubtedly a clumsy dip. "I thought you liked when I tried too hard."
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He doesn't say what feels obvious to him, that the grand gesture of saying he's all in maybe only falls a little flat because they've got barely more than two full weeks together now. Between the rooftop date and the penetrative sex, Gustave had assumed Verso was pretty committed to him for the time they had left together already.
"I do," he admits after he straightens up. He finds himself idly wishing he'd actually paid attention to learning to dance when he was younger. "And I'm trying to say, you're especially sexy when you're relaxed. That's all."
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...Which he's not going to do anymore, obviously. He's a new man, a better man. He's going to give Gustave a nice few weeks to fondly look back on once he's married Sophie and had 2.5 children with her, or whatever his future might hold.
"Fine," he says as Gustave returns to verticality, "I won't charm you. I'll pick my nose and leave the toilet seat up."
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"You taste like wine," he says, and it's a compliment.
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He steps back, too, hand skimming the railing as he takes the stairs down. "We'll have to rectify that. Music is better listened to with a drink." Especially when it's vaguely embarrassing 'you're my muse' improvisation.
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"We can share a bottle," he agrees, brushing his hand idly against the back of Verso's shirt as he follows him down the stairs. "I'm all in, too, by the way. In case that wasn't... implied obviously enough."
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He did embarrass himself in front of Sophie and Lucien, admittedly, but two people are easier to avoid than the entire population of Lumière. Besides, it's not like he was going to be chatting it up with Gustave's ex-girlfriend, anyway. What would he say? Wow, we have such similar taste in men.
Once he reaches the bottom of the steps, he turns to lounge against the railing, saying, "And here I thought you were just using me for my body."
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i don't like that while i wrote this you dmed me "speaking of gay incest"
😎
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"you're irreparable invalid markup"
no babe YOU'RE irreparable invalid markup
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the default iconing will continue until morale improves
im on so many drugs im just glad I'm on the right account?!
honored to receive the codeine tags
won't be offended if you ghost me until recovery is over tbh ...
no i welcome the codeine tags with open arms
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